First!

Yesterday my wonderful husband was able to make it home to us!
He had some snow chains to put on his truck and was able to drive home to us.
I've never felt more relieved for him to be here.
I didn't realize how tense I had been until he was home and my muscles were finally able to relax.
Unfortunately that didn't last long.
He was picked up this morning and traveled to work in this ice.
I am so nervous.
I thought I would share some pictures of taking Robert out to play in the snow and Paul's first time in the snow.
(We didn't even venture back out after Hubby got home. It was cold, and neither one liked it too much.)

 Trying to figure out the white stuff.

Put the camera on the mailbox to take this picture.

 He wanted to ride!

 Failed attempt to get them to both ride in the wagon.

 He got upset about the car not driving in the snow.

SO happy and relieved to see this truck in the driveway!!!

 Earlier in the day Robert had crawled into Paul's bed and was playing with his Scout toy. He's such a mess.

After the excitement of Daddy getting home we found them playing in Robert's room together.

We are so blessed to have such sweet boys.

Now we will pray for Hubby's safety as he is on his way to work, as he works, and Lord willing as he travels home this afternoon.

We sure are going to miss him!

Snowing

If you live around here, you know that there is snow today.
And LOTS of it.
It's so beautiful outside.
This would be wonderful if my husband was here at home with us.
He left his work 3 hours ago, and is still driving in this mess.
It's crazy everywhere with traffic.
He can't even come home, so he is going to try to make it to his parent's house.
I am not looking forward to being without him tonight.
It is pretty. And, I'm hoping he will look at my blog, so I'm going to post some pictures of here for him :) Love you!

 These were all taken about 2 hours ago (1:30PM or so) when I went outside. There is WAY more snow now.

 Neighbor kids sledding in our yard.

 I am so glad my father-in-law was here earlier today to turn on my fireplace. This house is FREEZING and I just can't seem to knock the chill off. Now I can sit in front of a nice fire.

This was taken about 15 minutes ago... The snow is still falling like CRAZY!

I would go outside and let Robert play in the snow... But he and Paul went down for a nap about 3 hours ago and they are both STILL ASLEEP.

I guess I will continue to sit here in the quiet and watch the winter storm brewing out of my window and pray about my husband making it to his parent's house safely.

**Update- Hubby made it safe and sound to his parent's house and spent the night there. We are hoping he can make the trip home today to be with us, but so far I haven't seen a single car pass by on the roads.
I feel awful for being so sad he isn't home. At least I know he is safe and sound. I know there are so many that didn't even make it home yesterday after spending many many hours in their vehicles attempting to travel. Many I'm sure spent the night away from their family and some I'm sure even in their cars trying to make it home.
I am just going to continue to pray and thank the Lord for watching over us and keeping us safe during this snow storm.

Vulnerable

I've been feeling a little exposed about my feelings since my last blog.
I'm not really sure who I am blogging for anymore.
I enjoy blogging for myself and being able to go back and read later.
I feel like I've been preserving memories a little too much.
Let me explain.
I started this year with Project Life. I have taken a picture every day for the year.
I intend to document this year in a scrapbook.
I will not allow myself to get discouraged or upset if I do not take a picture every single day.
I am just trying to do my best to preserve this precious time while my babies are so young.
I've also started a one-line-a-day journal.
I record special things I want to remember in my awesome planner that I use daily.
I just feel like I have been recording life in a good way, but I haven't any creative energy left for the blog as of now.
I will evaluate how I feel about it, and blog only when I get the creative urge.

Today I felt at home again.
I was able to make some homemade bread.
There is just nothing in the world like a loaf of fresh, hot homemade bread.
I am enjoying the cleanliness and organization of the house.

I have a few more areas of our house that need some extra special attention.
Basically, I just need to find an organizational system for these areas that works.
I've finally been able to implement some organizing systems lately using things I had on hand, and it's very helpful in my day-to-day tasks.
I just need to get all the family in on using my systems so they will operate properly.

In the next few months, these are my organizing goals for our home:

• R's closet
• P's dresser and closet
• Master bedroom closet
• Desk (I really want to set up a home command center, but I just haven't figured out where is best yet)
• Garage (When it warms up outside I would like to take every thing out of our garage, and set up an organizational system that works. I've seen a lot of garage organization that uses peg board and I really think it would suit our needs on one wall of the garage to have that installed. I also just need hubby to go through and help me weed out what is good in there, and where to put it so that he can find it easily)

• Crafts/Scrapbook (I really want to set up a scrapbook/crafting area and get it organized so that it will be easier to make crafts and complete my scrapbook) 

***Update- I have a new home command center that doubles as a crafting/scrapbook area. I LOVE IT.

I have a lot of goals for the house this year.
It's getting easier to accomplish them because I have actually been staying home more.
I love making a peaceful haven from the world for my family.
I love the time spent here and the memories being made.
I hope and pray that my family is happy and healthy and they enjoy being in our home as well.

Until next time..... :)

Self

***WARNING***
This is a very personal blog I am writing for myself. If you do not wish to read it, proceed no further.
If so, I will see you at the bottom of the page.

I read a blog towards the end of the year that really helped me. (here)

I feel like a major hypocrite.
A hypocrite that is way hard on myself.
I have allowed myself to become a victim of the media and the idea they portray of what makes a woman beautiful.
I have never in my life been "skinny."
Maybe I was skinny as a young child, but since I hit puberty I have been heavier than my peers.
It was hard as a young girl to be heavy and to deal with the pressures of everyone around me. It was hard to deal with being made fun of.
We as a society of women are constantly bombarded with images of supermodel-type women.
You know the type.
It makes everyone feel bad about themselves.
I personally beat myself up for not being skinny.
Yes, I need to lose weight and to be healthy. (But that isn't my point here)

I got to thinking a few months ago about what it would be like to have a little girl. (Thanks to my Hubby wanting one...)
I was thinking about how I would want to teach her to be comfortable in her own skin.
How it didn't matter what she weighed, but as long as she was active and healthy and doing the Lord's work it wasn't relevant what the scale told her.
I would want her to feel beautiful ALL the time.
I would want her to know that she doesn't have to have the trendiest clothes to be beautiful.
I would want to her know that a woman who is confident and comfortable in their own skin is the most beautiful woman there could be.

Thinking about these things, I realized that if she existed now she would probably never believe those things.
We get our self-confidence from our parents, especially as children. (Yes, our peers play a huge role as well.)
But as children we watch how our parents talk about themselves.
If as a mother I was always talking about how ugly and how fat I am, what would that tell my daughter?
If she believes I am superwoman (as I would hope she does) and that she wants to one day grow up to be just like me, what would that tell her about herself?
If I talk about how ugly and fat I am, how would that make her feel?
I am so guilty of this.
My husband would tell me all the time how beautiful and pretty I am. (and still does.)
My initial response as soon as he says it, "You're lying.", or "No I'm not, I'm so fat and ugly."
How does that make him feel?
If he believes I am beautiful, can I not just reply with a "Thank you."
No, because I truly didn't believe that I was beautiful.
I didn't realize my worth.

I am a CHILD of GOD.
 "But ye are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, an holy nation, a peculiar people; that ye should shew forth the praises of him who hath called you out of darkness into his marvelous light;" -1Peter 2:9

I got so caught up in wanting to look as the world would have every woman look, and I felt ugly and looked it too.
I was sour and depressed on the inside.
It truly shows on our outside how we feel about ourselves inside.

I have made it a personal goal to try to not "fat talk" or "ugly talk" myself.
I want to tell myself (Yes, even in my head) that I am beautiful.
I am worth something to someone.
I am confident.
I am positive.
I am loving.
I am kind.
I am an encourager.
I am happy.

I've read before that if you aren't confident about something, you "fake it till you make it."
I'm going to fake it till I make it and am all these things.

I can't be a positive light in the world for Christ if I am negative and ugly toward myself.
If I were to follow the command of "....Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself..." -Mark 12:31, I would be hateful to my neighbor.
I would say ugly things about them and be a huge discouragement.
I am doing these things to myself.

I MUST start loving myself so that I can have the ability to love those around me and all that I come in contact with.

I am challenging myself to say positive things to ME.
Will you join me in saying positive things to you?

Life in pictures.

 Recently... Life.
I haven't had much time for thinking about blogging.
I have a to-do list 10 miles long.
I have been trying to document the everyday life more, not on the blog... And I'm learning that it takes time to scrapbook and to journal.
After all the day-to-day documenting, there isn't much creative energy left to blog about all the things of which I have already physically documented.
Anyway, I do miss blogging more often.
I may switch from the documenting of our lives through this blog to start using it as an outlet for my thoughts on other things. Such as crafts, recipes, projects, organization, cleaning and anything involved with homemaking.
Interestingly (or not so interestingly) I do not blog for the benefit of anyone who reads my blog.
I blog SOLELY for me.
And I do not see that changing anytime soon.
So if you are reading this, welcome.
I hope you stay awhile (if you wish) and get to see a small glimpse into my mind.
Well, for now, Peace out.
I will return shortly.